REBLOG—-A Widow’s Rage Defense of Patton Oswalt’s Engagement

I have never re-blogged before but this topic had to be spoken about. Thank you to Erica Roman for this thoughtful blog entry!!

I cannot believe anyone would judge this man for finding love again. This man lost his wife unexpectedly a little over a year ago. He has managed to find love again and is engaged to be married. Until you walk a day in the shoes of an unexpected Widow or Widower and know what it feels like you should not judge. Even then you should not judge. Everyone’s path is different. Everyone grieves differently. It is none of your business when a Widow(er) moves on. We are in living hell, sad, lonely, and in my case young and unexpectedly the rug was pulled out from under me and my husband died. I did not ask to be here in this space. I did not ask for him to leave we did not divorce. We were in love and then he was gone. The fact that Widow(ers) are resilient and can get up and attempt to trust someone and perhaps love someone again is remarkable. Life is short so we should all not be afraid to live and love again. My personal journey is no one’s business but I can totally see how someone could find love this fast. Widow(ers) know that life is fleeting, that we are all dying. We learn to live in the moment. When we feel something we usually decide to take the risk and tell the other person. If you would think less of me for moving on from a life I did not choose. Please do me a favor and de-friend me now because judgement of anyone has no place in my world. Great blog post from a Widow on the topic. I can only hope that some day someone will love me again and I can share the remaining years I have with a wonderful man. Living this great life alone is not what any of us signed up for.

Best of luck Patton Oswalt may she bring you happiness, joy, and life!

Erica Roman Blog

Yesterday I was very excited to see that the comedian Patton Oswalt had announced his engagement to Meredith Salenger. Now, anyone who know’s me knows that I don’t follow the lives of celebrities at all. I’ve made an exception for him. Our spouses both unexpectedly died within 3 days of each other and both of us have processed our grief journey fairly openly. (Of course, his platform is a mite bigger than mine lol)

On the 102nd day of his journey (105 for me) he wrote in a Facebook post,

“I was face-down and frozen for weeks. It’s 102 days later and I can confidently say I have reached a point where I’m crawling. Which, objectively, is an improvement. Maybe 102 days later I’ll be walking.”

I shared that post on my own page because I could connect to that place he was in. No longer frozen, but the…

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